what to do when in constant transition
i can't remember ever feeling "settled." i always look to the future. some days it's genuinely because my life is in transition, but most days it's because i want to get out of my present situation in some way. right now i'm feeling that again with my work circumstances, despite it literally being a dream job - or at least a dream job for a version of me. my trauma still haunts me in whispers these days. what do you do when you chronically long for change? my current attempt at an antidote is the opposite of it - a rhythm. a ritual. finding daily or weekly things i can do that can ground me or refresh me. things like a good sleep schedule, a grounding mantra, a book club with friends. i think these things help pull me back to the reminder that life is always a cycle, and yet, always new. some days i wonder if i have become my trauma, if i will ever escape. of course, i still do my best to add spontaneity to my days. i might pull out the sewing machine or write